...is it just a litte bit a little bit

So i gave up finishing reading Big Fish. I only had like 40 pages left (out of like 180 total). The book sucked, just see the movie and forget the book. I decided to continue reading "The Blind Watchmaker" by Richard Dawkins. Any self-respecting biologist that studies any remotley bio-related field should read and love this book. I got half way through it, and so now i am going to finish it.

The book is a rebuttal to the Creationist's "strongest" argument that if there is no way something as complex as a watch could come together by mere chance, then there is no way something as complex as life could come together by mere chance.  He says that there is a watchmaker, but it is blind, and it is natural selection. 


Here is my first part from it that i have read lately that i loved:

"Once we are allowed simply to postulate organized complexity, if only the organized complexity of the DNA/protein replicating engine, it is relatively easy to invoke it as a generator of yet more organized complexity. That, indeed, is what most of this book is about. But of course any God capable of intelligently designing something as complex as the DNA/protein replicating machine must have been at least as complex and organized as that machine itself. Far more so if we suppose him additionally capable of such advanced functions as listening to prayers and forgiving sins.  To explain the origin of the DNA/protein machine by invoking a supernatural Designer is to explain precisely nothing, for it leaves unexplained the origin of the Designer.  You have to say something like 'God was always there,' and if you allow yourself that kind of lazy way out, you might as well just say 'DNA was always there,' or 'Life was always there,' and be done with it."

Gotta love biologists.  I need to hang out with more. Tarah, come visit me in Boston.  We can get drunk and create new names for all sorts of organic compounds.  aaah  good times!



P.S----> totally off topic, new thing to say:  "When the lunch bell rings, why dont you EAT ME!"



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    oingo boingo


I fucking love to eat. But why do we eat? It seems so weird to just pick something up and shove it inside your body (insert smirk). Well, through many super cool metabolic pathways, Food is eventually translated into Energy (harnessed in those o-so-neat phosphoanhydride bonds, no you know what you are doing when adding a comment, I know you have wanted to know for quite sometime). Well everyone’s body constantly uses roughly the same amount of energy, but what do we do with what is left over? This energy can be used either Mentally or Physically….

Speaking Ecologically (think of just animals in their natural habitat doing their thaaaang), 85% Physical exertion and 15% Mental exertion. This would be my best estimate for the proportion of physical to mental exertion that an individual animal would typically display in nature to function normally. Perhaps the mental percentage would be even less if you discount instinct, and only describe cognition and critical thinking (in this case the figures might seem to be more like 91% to 9%). Humans on the other hand, display almost a complete reciprocal. In order to function we typically exert about 15% physically and 85% mentally (if you think we exert more than that on average, turn your head to the right and look at that fat fuck at the computer next to you, his family is a bunch of fat fucks too). What about the Humans who functions at a much higher ratio, say their mental exertion is closer to 95%, physical exertion being 5% (remember that we are speaking about a proportion, so this person could run to the stop sign as often as most people, but s/he uses their brain so much more that the proportion comes out differently). These people are engrained in our history as great minds who have made great contributions to mankind (Einstein, Thomas Jefferson, Socrates, Ben Franklin, Jerry Seinfeld, ect.). Now, what about the people who are on the flip-side. Humans who exert 5% of their energy Mentally, and 95% of their energy Physically. Looking at the trend, one could postulate these people would be shunned by society. We would view them as lower than animals on a scale of mental evolution, equating them with something like the Emu. However, this is not the case. We love these people. We pay them millions and millions of dollars every year. My roommates paid an extra $200 some odd dollars just so that they wouldn’t miss one of them on the TV. These people we refer to as “professional athletes,” the lowest form of intelligence on Earth. Them being the lowest form of intelligence on Earth, what is to be said for those people who idolize these aforementioned? I live with 4 of them, and I have yet to find a valid reason for the existence of this behavior.

(no subject)

as promised...thanks for all 2 out of 18 people on my friends list who actually did this (insert sarcasm here), but i got the lines together for the book poem. Had i not participated, or made the entry public, my pathetic poem would only have two lines.

The title of my poem is, "I hope all 16 of you are happy"

the seven deadly sins, except one, which, try as i might, i simply
rarely will you build just a single web page
She says, "Do you have any rubbers?"
So long virtue, hello fun

...sitting on that street corner, i will never forget that moment

I wanted to cry. Anything could have made me cry at that instance. At the other point in my life when i felt that exact same way, i did cry. At what???

.Being Completely Stripped.

Stripped of everything that matters, and perhaps many things which do not matter. Stripped all away and what are you left with, everyone is left with something different, i was left with tears. Not tears of sadness or tears of joy or any other emotion, or even cleaning tears. Just Tears.

The first time i felt these tears i was scared, and the tears came. Unstoppable tears. Upon re-experiening this same feeling, unexpecting i might add, the tears were there ready to come, but they didnt. This particular moment i wanted them to come but they didnt. However, i knew that i had been completely stripped again, and it felt so good. It felt awsome to be completely stripped again, and learning a little bit more about who the fuck i really am, and what the fuck it is i am supposed to do
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(no subject)

Stolen from

mrneo, but changed a little

1. Grab the nearest book.

2. Open the book to page 15.

3. Find the sixth sentence.

4. Post the text of the sentence as a comment, and i'll post the whole thing as an ljpoem. Include what book it came from.


Tuesday – has always been my least favorite day of the week. Monday is an excuse in itself to be slow and hating life. Wednesday is half way to Friday, and I get paid every Wednesday, so it is an exciting day. Thursday is basically Friday, and Thursdays seem to go by quickly. Friday needs no explanation. What does Tuesday have that is special? Nothing, until recently! Tuesday, June 15 my plane leaves (8:50am to be exact!), so now every Tuesday I get to count off another week till I move! It is down to 9 weeks from this exact minute that I am typing this (8:31am) I will be at Lindberg Field most likely lining up with a bunch of very tan people to get on a plane to go where the people aren’t nearly as tan.

I found out yesterday that Kenny decided to move in with his girlfriend and her parents, leaving Darek with no housing of his own. So now Darek doesn’t have anyone to live with. I feel bad cause we have lived together for over 3 years total, and I really don’t want to ditch him by himself, but I have to, and I think that he understands that. He doesn’t have to make any commitments till the end of July, so there is still time for him to figure things out. I would pack him up and ship him to Boston with me, but I know he wouldn’t like that.

I have been having all these freaky dreams about people from High School. It’s not that fun since I hated High School, and most everybody at my HS too. At least I don’t run into them as much anymore since im not at SDSU, and I will sure as hell not run into many (if any at all) in Boston.

So as you can see, not much at all has changed, I am just obviously excited about moving and don’t have much of anything else to talk about. Other cool things coming up include:

Xara Project (which I cant WAIT for, it should be tons of fun, unless the sasquatch goes, then things could get annoying)

stellastarr* and The Killers at the Casbah (awesome band at awesome place 24.6oz Steinlager here I come!),

Basement Jaxx supposedly is going to be in SD sometime kinda soonish, hopefully before I leave.

HK, Tarah’s, and Jessica’s graduamation,

Just started reading Big Fish (finished Valley of the Dolls and liked it but had mixed feelings, Big Fish was such an awesome movie so now I want to read the book),

Not going to Coachella (ummm im not really excited that I am not going, I really want to go, but it doesn’t fit the budg)

Packing and moving (oh wait, I am supposed to try and not talk about moving for a minute, ooops)

(QUICK SIDENOTE! : my boss just called and he is not coming in today! That means that 4 of our 6 engineers are not in – so I most likely will not be accomplishing anything today, I cant believe I ever complained about this job)

this popped into my head while i was pumping gas this weekend

If you attack a black guy solely because he is black, and you make it blatantly obivious that you attacked him solely becuase he was black, then this is a hate crime.

So, If you attack a member of the KKK solely because he is affiliated with the KKK, then is this also considered a hate crime? It was a crime based solely on hate for one particular group in society, which would satisfy the necessary requirements for a hate crime, but it is a hate crime out of hate for hate. So is this a hate hate crime? And if so, how is hating hate a criminal offense?

...the world may never know

(no subject)

There is this guy at work, and his name is Briz, (it is pronounced Breeze, the first time I heard his name I totally thought he would be a dirty hippie, but that is far from the case). So this guy Briz is quite a character, I think that he is about 24. I have nothing against him at all. I enjoy hanging out with him, I have fun around him, I think he is a pretty cool guy. Shit, I even drove up to Ontario, CA to buy his parents dryer off of them. Briz is from a big Mexican family, I bet that his mothers cooking is to die for. I was a witness at Briz’s big Mexican catholic wedding, where he married Stacy. Stacy is a nice girl who wants to be a teacher(I think?). Briz always has at least one pen in his shirt pocket. Briz always has a belt on, and his pants snug around his hips. Briz always has a smile on his face. Briz talks much like an operator of space mountain would (he actually did work at Disneyland and he met his wife there, and he proposed to her there, and I think that is so cool!). Briz’s favorite alcoholic drink is a “pink lady,” and he is never too proud not to order one, (but only one). As you can see, I respect Briz, he is not a bad guy. I wish him the best in life, and I know that he will do just fine.

From my image of Briz however, I view myself as the Anti-Briz. I do not think that I could ever follow in Briz’s footsteps. Granted, the guy is making 54Kish a year right outta college, I couldn’t do it. He graduated college, where I am sure he did an amount of partying that was sufficient for him, (most likely highly insufficient for me, but that’s beside the point) got a job as an engineering intern, worked during school, graduated, got hired on full-time, married, bought a house in sub-urbia SD county, commutes to and from work each day, refers to Stacy as ‘the wife,’ and wants to have babies. These babies will grow up, he will work hard at his engineering job to get money for them, they will use his money to go to college, they will get jobs and spouses so they can make money to put their kids in college and so on and so on and so on. I cant think of a more boring existence. The monotony alone would be enough to drive me to crack. How can people want to limit themselves to this boring shithole lifestyle that our modern society has deemed normal?? That is what is expected of me. I am expected to get a high paying job, so I can knock up some tramp who will spit out some smelly kids. Then spend my cash on these brats so they can get jobs and put my slobbering old ass into a home.

I got a better idea. Why don’t we just skip the middle man. Don’t have kids, put money away for your retirement if you care about it(shall you be lucky enough to make it that far, personally I would be damn surprised if I do), live off money you make from your part-time job selling crack, and have as much fun as you can until you are too old to remember where you left your teeth. All the experiences and places you can go are endless. People say that living in the Burbs and having a family and a stationwagon is a respectable and rewarding life. My ass. I don’t see one person say that they feel coming into work everyday just so they can go home and listen to their kids scream makes their life rewarding. So what am I going to do that will make my life more rewarding than theirs?? That is what I am going to find out. There must be something more rewarding to life than the boring lifestyle that we have conjured up as normal. Maybe it doesn’t exist? Maybe life really does peak when you are 16, and its just shitty from then on cause you only realize more and more that there isn’t anything better? Maybe that’s why people shoot up heroin? Maybe that’s why people spend all their time and money at church desperately trying to escape their grim reality? Maybe that is why prisons are packed with people who said ‘fuck it’ to sanity and lashed out towards other humans? Maybe that’s why lesser intelligent animals seem to be overly satisfied with the simplest things? Maybe there really isn’t much all so great about life beyond being 16 years old. Who knows, who will ever know? I’d like to try and find out, and prove to myelf that i can live the most fascinating life every fucking day that i am on this planet.